Reality checks are verbal inquiries that most people do to check the truth of an uncertainty. Reality checking happens to those of us who are living one day at a time recovery. For instance we might think that we have done something that has upset somebody because their body language and tone of voice is angry when they arrive home one day. The monkey in our mind tells us that they don’t like us. It also tells us that we don’t measure up as a person because of it. Then we feel worse because the monkey then tells us it’s all true. After all, why else would they be angry? They seem like they’re always pleasant and easy going but now they’re angry. What am I supposed to do? This is the time to do a reality check. We ask them, “Are you angry with me?” They tell us no that they have to cover someone’s shift on Saturday. They meant to call but work was busy and they also say they’re sorry and you believe them because of lived experience with them and their reassurance. We have done a simple reality check that has put an end to our uncertainty.
