Those of us living in one day at a time recovery believe that the first difficulty of Self is Self itself. As we discovered from the experience and wisdom of those who have came before us we were led to believe Self runs amuck in much of our thoughts and steadfast beliefs. Self fears for its well being in regards to its physical being. Self fears for its well being in regards to its emotional being. And Self even fears for its well being in regards to its mental or intellectual well being. Self fears for its well being quite frequently, and can escape these Self obsessive fears with pleasure. Food, companionship, sex, and intoxicants have a way of calming the uneasiness. They become tension relief and they take the edge off a bit. The thing about Self is that Self is the mind, body, and spirit. When fearful many of us have a need for calm. We, as was said before, have to smooth the edge. When this need becomes an obsession for the the mind, body, or spirit, it is what we call addiction. When it becomes harmful and we have our lives becoming unmanageable we are experiencing the ill effects of addiction. We learn this ourselves pretty quickly but we will often dismiss, or reject this knowledge. Self often forgets the problems and unmanageability of addiction, and the results can be devastating. Those with experience told us we will end up in institutions or dead. The addicted Self denies this. The healthy Self know this. Often the healthy Self cries out, “God help me!” Those with experience have taught us we are not here for the well. Enjoy your lives. Some of us had to stop or die. So we reached out. One day at a time.
