Before recovery, humiliation was something we thought meant the same as humility. Frequently ashamed of behaviours, using addicts see themselves in as negative a light as most of society sees them. Maybe for a time, the addict thinks they are “cool” because they are users, standing outside the mainstream of society, radicals who know something that all those straight people have missed out on. As the shame and degradation become more and more apparent in the addict’s life, however, the voice of condemnation eventually becomes louder. The alternatives are to use more in hopes of shutting out that voice or, if you can hear the message of recovery, seek a new way to live. When the addict first seeks recovery, chances are they carry a great deal of shame. When the word “humility” comes up, they hear “humiliation”. Eventually, though, as recovery builds in the life of the addict, they come to see that true humility is recognizing that we all have flaws and have done many things of which we are ashamed but that, at the same time, we have good qualities that we can be proud of and that we can use to help us rebuild lives. Eventually, we see that humility involves acknowledging our flaws even as we embrace the things we are discovering about ourselves of which we can be proud. We’ll never be perfect, but that’s okay. One day at a time, we’ll continue our quest to be better.
