There are times in our recovery that we might try to fit in with a group, or a cause, or a reality that is probably a bit foreign to us but in all reality, we simply just don’t. It might be upsetting to us which is in all truth really okay. We might feel rejected when we don’t fit in but reality will let us know that we will discover beyond the best we know or the really real of resilience. We belong with those we are akin with which is with the people who get us few as they might be. Perhaps just our spouses or partners, a few other recovering people, and maybe a couple of other loving or concerned people. We need to see beyond fitting in. We just need to belong. Especially with ourselves. We need to remember this. It’s what resilience is all about. Peace.
The biggest really real that we do get to understand when we are living in one day at a time recovery is that we all matter, we all count and we are all enough. When we understand this we understand that each and everyone of us are important and that we all belong in this big, messy, and sometimes cruel world. In difficult times we need to know that life is doable and that tough times do pass in time. Knowing this is the reality of radical resilience that lives in each and every one of us. We all matter, we all count, and we are all enough.. Reach out for help and hang in there. It’s important and so are you. Peace.
Many of us living in one day at a time recovery know that in our talks, conversations, and writings the topics don’t really change all that much. We refer to reaching out to give and to receive help. We mention grace, gratitude, humility, resilience, desperation, and living one day at a time. We believe in God (the spirit and the universe), paradox, reality, and being part of the rooms of recovery. We also believe that somehow we are all inextricably connected knowing the importance of one day at a time abstinence. And in all reality many of us know depression, anxiety, and the scourges of obsessive and compulsive thinking. We also know the reality of bottoming out and the joy of living in one day at a time recovery. The topics are constant because they keep us honest and healthy. It’s our gift to each other. Peace.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery know everyday brings hope. We don’t have to feel, experience, or absolutely understand how we have hope. It’s not a matter of faith, trust, good deeds, or anything that we have done that merits us this reality. There is hope everyday because of pain, sickness, death, and tragedy. It is because chains, terror, cruelty, and ill will supersede any act of decency or kindness. It is because want gets twisted into greed, addiction, and to the very least obsessive want. It’s because life gets so selfish we don’t even care enough to share the air that we breathe or the water that we drink. It’s because we wage war with our neighbors because we want what they have or they are a threat to our sanctimonious belief of ourselves, our God, and our society. Everyday we awaken we know this pain, this wrong, and this truth. We shed the tears, we heave the sighs, we sob the sobs, and we know the dark deep days of depression. But still we sing, we smile, we work, we laugh, and we can be exceedingly grateful. People marry or form unions of togetherness. Kindness and charity is a part of our lives. Children are born and they sing their funny rhymes. And even poets can smile. What else could we do but believe their is hope everyday. Hope is because it has to be. It’s a kin to love. There is no other reality.
Those of us who live with mental health disorders and addictions need to come in out of the rain. Depressed, lonely, and tired is the rain no-one should live in. Those of us who are living in one day at a time recovery know this. We came in out of the rain. We reached out for help. Reaching out is the courageous and brave thing to do. We received professional help and some of us found our way in out of the rain. Many of us found tools to help live well lives. Many of us live one day at a time. Whether we believe it or not, we deserve to feel good. We deserve to come in out of the rain.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery know that when we are comparing ourselves to others we are actually setting ourselves up for judgements of being superior to or less than other people. Both judgements are detrimental to our health and wellbeing. When we judge ourselves to be superior to others we can become vain in such ways of possibly passing egocentric bitterness upon others. In humility and in recovery we should know all people are equal in worth because we are all human beings. When comparison brings us to the decision that we are less than others we are in all actuality passing judgements of inferiority upon ourselves. Neither of these comparison has ever helped us in anyway whatsoever. It’s like asking parents which child they love the most. Comparison can become a harmful exercise in futility. In time we awaken to this healthier reality. Peace.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery understand the search for otherness. We understand that the otherness we desire to experience is part of an inherited make-up which has made us living breathing human beings with the need to belong to something bigger and astronomically more powerful than ourselves. For some of us it as as simple as going fishing. For some of us it is a belief that all people are inextricably connected in the human existence. Also many of us choose to call the otherness God, the spirit or the universe. In our recovery when we take a simple breath we experience the reality of the otherness. The otherness pulls us out of the dark places of our journeys letting us know we are not alone and we belong. We also get to know happiness and joy. In this we understand grace. This is our imperfect humble one day at a time recovery. Peace.
Most people living in one day at a time recovery don’t want to be hard to get along with. If we look at life realistically we know that there are times that we are. Being hard to get along with usually comes into play when things don’t go the way we think they should. The reason such things make us hard to get along with is because when we feel like we are losing control, or are about to lose control, fear becomes the catalyst driving our thinking. Another reality is our fearful ego responds in a way that it must assert itself in all situations. When we learn to ease our fears and can let go of egoic control we are easier to get along with. We don’t have to become doormats but we do have to listen to others. We mean really listen. Perhaps then we won’t always be so hard to get along with. Peace.
Many people living life one day at a time know when reality is too difficult. We might try to solve challenging situations buy ourselves, but reality beats the hell out of us and we know that we need help. People who are very strong and wise have taught us this. Reaching out for help from professionals, family members, and friends doesn’t need to be a humiliating experience. We all need help at one time or another. People are not built to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders forever. If it’s too difficult we reach out. Be it depression, anxiety, addictions, or other health issues, we reach out to health professionals. If we have other difficulties we reach out to the appropriate people and agencies that can help. We will be required to follow direction. It’s reality. Once again, we all need help. It lessens the load. Peace.
Those of us who live in one day at a time recovery know that it would be an absolutely ridiculous endeavor if we were to seek a life that has no anger or resentment. The best that we can possibly do is to feel such feelings and then participate in the process of letting them go. If we decide to live a life full of anger and resentment we will become bitter and depressed people. Obsessive thinking takes us there. Do we really need to unleash our wrath. When the answer that comes to us is “no” we begin to heal or in other words we are starting to let go. It takes time. That’s reality. We let go to be free. Peace.