As I think of give and take, and I think of my personal experience, I wonder if I think of myself as being unique. Recovering people I know describe themselves as being happy, joyous, and free. I think of myself as being reasonably happy and content.
I do not believe that I have a monopoly on the true experience of one day at a time recovery. I know that the people I know, who are in one day at a time recovery, have the experience of living happy, joyous and free lives.
I have been asked why do you have to be reasonably happy?
Perhaps my friends think being reasonably happy puts a damper on life.
Addicts and alcoholics have their struggles. Sometimes their struggles are the natural struggles of life such as depression, anxiety, uncertainty, loneliness, and disconnection. In reality, when asked if they are reasonably happy, they can recognize that adversity is a reality of life and that life brings with it reasonable happiness and contentment. This is freedom.
I understand happy, joyous, and free. It feels good. It is not a perpetual life style and it would be unrealistic to think so. Experience tells us this.
I understand reasonable happiness and contentment. It is not a perpetual life style and it would be unrealistic to think so. Experience tells us this.
Nothing is unique in one day at a time living and recovery. No one is unique in one day at a time living and recovery.
Connect with your story. Identify with the common aspects of others.
I have heard from many recovering people that not every day is a bed of roses and it would be unreasonable to think otherwise. Understanding this makes us content, or free, one day at a time. Thank you for reading.
Connecting with other people is important for our mental health and our well being as people. I know that some of us might be introverts but that does not mean that we don’t connect with others. There are times that as we are connecting with others that we help both those we are connecting with as well as ourselves. Some call this give and take. Some of us call it friendship. Some call this survival. The experiences of connection let us know that we are not alone and that we are enough. We get through the days, both good and bad, and we stay sober one day at a time. One friend reminded me the other night that one day – one day – one day – can lead to many years of contented sobriety. Another friend reminded me that life can be hard at times. Both of these people have been a big help to me in my years of recovery. Connection really helps.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery are people who are trying to keep peace with humility. Keeping peace with humility reminds us we are all people and all people are of equal value. Our reality tells us when we sit in judgement of others, or even ourselves, we are measuring the value and the lives of human beings. Often when we do this, we do so with a self-righteous view. Humility reminds us of the hypocrisy of such judgements. Many of us catch ourselves doing so and realize we do so being caught up in pride, fear, or envy. There are even times when our judgement causes us to create scapegoats of people or peoples. One day at a time recovery has a way of making us aware of such judgements. Humility tells us to stop throwing stones. At others or ourselves. Humility is a gift.
Those of us who live in one day at a time recovery understand new beginnings. New beginnings, for most of us, are the endings of severely unmanageable lives. Lives lacking any semblance of reality, or manageability, have slipped away from us. We have found love and belonging in a kinship of spiritual misfits. We found we are not alone and it’s a wonderful awakening. Families, friends, and other advocates have given us a voice. With this voice we don’t claim to be perfect. We know we are no better or no worse than any other people. We know the voice that we now have brings with it the responsibility of caring for ourselves, and each other, to best of our ability. When we are grateful for our new beginnings we understand a life of one day at a time recovery. We now know that change can happen and many of us do so one day at a time. We become healthy in the company of others, and we understand the meaning of grace. Even though our mannerism, beliefs, and abilities can be different than others, we are learning to adapt and function at levels we could have never done before. When this happens we understand that miracles still happen. Thank God for new beginnings. We are no longer alone.
Many of us who live in one day at a time recovery try to believe in God. We find if there is something about this God is he, she, or whatever, truly cares. And we believe whatever this force does for one person it can do for others. Most of us are pretty sure we cannot completely comprehend the why or how. Our reality is we know this force is love. It has modelled for us the miracle of one day at time recovery through those who have shown us how to be happy, joyous, and free. We start to see that this amiable and caring power working through other people. As this power worked through other people we had first hand experience of the gifts of love and empathy. We began to find clarity and we understand grace. These are gifts. It’s simple reality.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery understand that when we feel that we must stand alone we are in all actuality standing with the other. The other, which is the reality of what we call God, the spirit, or the universe will always stand with us. The truth is that he, she, they, or it will actually pick us up when we fall. The other actualizes the concept and the materialization of grace. We all know this. We just need a few moments of awareness, freedom, and a one day at a time hint of gratitude for grace to sink in. When it couldn’t or wouldn’t many of us reached out for professional help. Some of us needed medication and guidance to find this reality. The other is the inextricable connection that lives in us all. People living in one day at a time recovery simplistically reveal this to us. This is the other’s way of making awareness easy. We stand together. Peace.
People living in one day at a time recovery understand that there are times when we can’t find today. Not being able to find today is a rare but common occurrence. Often we find today while we are present in the moment as we are occupied by the task which is at hand during such times. The present has been brought to us either by the often drawn out experiences of our past which has brought us into a better today which at one time might have been the worries and preparations of a perhaps perceived troubled future. Today can be the grace of our one day at a time aspirations of what recovery would be all about. In all reality when we can’t find today we are either knocking at the door of depressive or anxious thinking. In all reality one day at a time recovery teaches us not to ruminate at such places. Some of us believe the reality of these portals are the realities of life which are and were unavoidable. Reality reveals this to us and there will be times when we can’t find today but we do develop resilience. In time we will find today. Peace.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery understand that most of us still have a tendency to react to the differences of opinion that we, as people, most certainly will experience, and defend, as we live and grow in one day at a time recovery. We adamantly hold fast onto our beliefs as non-listening combatants would do fearing differing opinions are in our reality a threat to our very existence. Experience will teach us that for the most part of our reaction is a fear-based response. In accordance with our reality as recovering people, our greatest threat is the words, “You can have just a couple can’t you?”. Our experienced reality is, “No I can’t.” Should there been any more attempts at persuasion we just leave. It’s a simple as that. We don’t need to defend ourselves any more. Our need for sobriety is not just an opinion. It’s reality. It takes a divine grace to keeps us safe. We need to understand this. Peace.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery understand the reality of plain old denial. Most of us who truly understand what denial truly is is that we are people who have relapsed back into active addiction after having a bit of time being abstinent. We discovered that active addiction only gets worse. Constant vigilance and the much needed support that we can find in the rooms of recovery teaches us the reality of being responsible enough to reach out to each other one day at a time. In this, and because of this, we discover the reality of divine intervention. We need not succumb to the cravings and the callings of active addiction. Just ask those of us who have learned the hard way. We need to accept reality. Reach out. Peace.
Many people living in one day at a time recovery understand and enjoy the reality of simple happiness. Simple happiness is. It just is. It can be found in the glimpse of a smile or in the sound of laughter. It can also be found in the taste of an apple or in a thirst quenched by water. In can be found in the freedom of choice where once freedom was lost. It’s the song of a cardinal or the drumming of drums. It is joy, it is hope, and it’s truth. It is gratitude and simple grace. It is mystery and love and it’s peace. It is. It just is. Peace.