Is it the lack of control of our lives that increase bouts of depression, anxiety, anger, guilt, aloneness and shame? Do these emotions bring us to the despair of suicidal ideology? Do we become captive to these sequential thoughts?
This aloneness, this damned aloneness, fuels the fires of the despair of self.
We feel so alone that we cannot see even a dim flicker of hope in this dark tunnel we are in.
This dark tunnel had no opening but once we are on this dim road of depression we believe that a horrible grasp of ill will is smothering us just as sure as there was someone holding a pillow over our face. We gasp for breath like a person who is drowning.
The noises in our heads begin to wear us down. It tells us we deserve this. In some twisted way we start to accept this and we start to believe there is no way out.
Some of us try to hide from these emotions by escaping as much as we can. Booze, pot, sex… They work for a while and we don’t see we are carving our premature death date on our tomb stone.
“HERE LIES A TROUBLED SOUL”
Most people cant understand this but we do.
Some of us have cried out God help me but we feel like we’re on God’s shit list. Maybe, just maybe, God is on our shit list. What is God anyways.
But we hear people say “We’ve been there.” And guess what – we still go there today but not as often and not as bad.
We have walked the thin line that turned into a foot path. For most of us it turned into a side-walk that we walk one step at a time. Some times two steps forward and one step back.
We know the bullies, the jerks, ands the mean people. Hell! There were times that we were them.
But now, this moment, this hour, this day, we know we are loved. We are a kin.
And we know that we are loved for we have learned to love ourselves. We have befriended ourselves.
When those thoughts come that want us to die – those thoughts that come when we want to die we say no. We say “NO”
“I AM ENOUGH”.
Maybe someday, somebody will need you to say, “I know you. YOU ARE ENOUGH”
We’ve been there and We know you, “YOU ARE ENOUGH”